Picture source: Life by Kerbbi via Flickr

A recent UN released list of countries by life expectancy rated Singapore’s overall life expectancy from birth is at 80 years old. I thought that’s quite a long time to live on this earth – Well, depending what do you do with it!

A conversation I had with my mentor some years ago enlightened me about how I can choose to see my life in different stages, hence how I might be able to use it purposefully. Here are the four stages of twenty years I have learned:

Learning – The first-twenty (Birth to 20 years)

Without doubt the first-twenty years is the time we spend most in learning. This is not to say that we don’t learn after this stage, in fact lifelong learning is what keep us going throughout our life time. But we do spend the most time at this stage learning from school, our parents and friends. We experiment with our growing up, our potentials and interest. We learn via our physiological, psychological and social changes largely during the first twenty years or so. We are at our most rebellious,  we fall in love, we learn about friendship and camaraderie. We learn a lot about our fear, like and dislike, values and faith etc. For men in Singapore, I guess the learning would probably peak when we are enrolled in National Service which is a very steep learning curve for most of us.

Building – The second-twenty (21 to 40 years)

Physically and mentally we are probably at our best in the second twenty years. In Singapore societal norm, many of us will starts our career in our early or mid-twenties depending on your academic route. As we embarked on our career choice, this also could be a time for many of us to be involved in some form of serious relationship especially so when we begin to find our financial independence. I sensed that many of us will faced lots of uncertainty in the first 10 years of the second -twenty. We may move from one job to another, we might faced disappointment in our relationship (hence, emotionally we may lack maturity). Most of us would get married in late twenties to early thirties. Building relationship, family, financial prowess, home, career and I think this also could be the critical twenty years that we shape our idiosyncrasies.

Extending – The third-twenty (41 to 60 years)

Some says that life begin at forty. I am at this stage at the moment. I sensed that it got a lot to do with how we managed our second twenty. For me, its kind of a catch-up as I somehow lost focus in my early twenties. At this stage, we begin to extend our career to its full potential (and income), we also begin to extend our family tree, have more children, and for some lucky ones grandchildren. For some, we might also begin to experiencing some body-aches and health scares. We begin to see the importance of extending our life span so that we may enjoy the fruits of our labor. At this stage, we tends to extend our knowledge, experiences, know-how; both at work and social spaces. We begin to take on roles such as managers, leaders,  elders, mentor and coach. Some may spare no efforts in extending their reputations, titles, expertise and so on…

Giving – The forth twenty (61 to 80 years)

This is the season of giving. A time to contribute back to the place/people you have so benefited from…But don’t get me wrong, we ought to be giving at any stage of our life in any way we can. But there are so much to give when you begin the final twenty; your time (for those who are very successful career wise in third-twenty), your experiences and knowledge, your money (yes, you can’t take it with you can you?). What else? Your advice and positive influences…and many would argue that that is why our Minister Mentor would continue to be an valuable asset to our new generation of leaders.

I begin to realized that managing each twenty with care is so critical to how well we can best serve our purpose. For example, if we do not spend our energy and focus on the first twenty in learning, we may need to do catch up in the second twenty and what may not have fulfill in the second twenty might have to play catch up in the third-twenty and so on so forth…

Which twenty are you in right now?

What is your purpose in life that makes the present twenty clearer to you than ever before?